regression

yesterday i was 13 years old. as reported earlier this week, my upcoming weekend activities require new clothing and yesterday afternoon was the only time that i was not working and stores were open at the same time. so i gathered all of the courage i could muster and i entered the mall. i parked outside of macy's--didn't know that until i entered the nearest door and i was inside macy's--so i began my spree there. first i wandered through the department that appeared to have clothing designed for people my age. there were a lot of ugly shirts and jeans with built-in hips. there was one pair of jeans that i loved but of course they didn't have my size so i moved on in frustration. next i did something i haven't done since i was in 8th grade and swore i would never do again. i saw a denim jacket and LIKED IT. for several years now i have firmly believed that the "jean jacket" as we called them, had no business running around outside of 1988. i also have always held fast that i am not a person who can pull off the denim jacket. but there was one hanging on the sale rack that seemed to have exactly the right proportions, not too busy, not too dull, short but not rib cage short (a fashion faux pas that i think needs more attention than it gets) and the perfect shade of indigo. i tried it on and much to my surprise i loved it. and i knew that i must buy it. so for the first time in almost 20 years, i was going to own a jean jacket.
since all the other clothes in that section of the store were boring and ugly, i moved on. i was meandering with hopes of finding a cashier when i happened upon a vast array of the most adorable and attractive jeans/tops/black pants/shoes/capris i have ever witnessed. the juniors section, i quickly realized. i hate that the only clothes i like and the only ones that really fit me (what with man-hips issue and all) are always the clothes designed to be worn to middle school. i denied my grown-person shame and grabbed everything i liked and headed to the fitting room. the child who was working at the till seemed curious about why someone's mom was taking clothes into the fitting room without a preteen to try them on. i ignored her. as a result of my boldness, another thing happened that i have not done since about age 13--i absolutely had to have a pair of guess jeans. i feel so silly owning guess jeans because they were such a symbol of cool cult-ure in my preteen years. it sounds funny to even say the name out loud. but they were, hands-down, the most adorable jeans i have seen in a very long time. (could be that i have shopped at kohl's for too long and have forgotten the benefits of clothing that is actually assembled accurately and symmetrically.) so there i was-- somebody's mom heading to the till with a jean jacket a pair of guess jeans some clearance flipflops with shiny decorations and a pair of black pants that called themselves "career pants" even though they were in the section of the store dedicated to prepubescent fashionforward little darlings. and this was the best clothing purchase i have made in years. i even went home and tried them all on again. just like my mom made me do when i was 13.

thank you jennifer aniston and courtney cox-arquette for blurring the line between teen fashion and thirty-something threads.