more TOYS!

my intense love, as a child, for "doing hair" on inanimate objects must be the most stereotypically girly thing about me. the 1980's provided ample opportunities for us to comb and brush and braid and "rat" long plastic hair strands. i think i even had a curling "iron" that was plastic and did NOT heat up, but somehow still did manage to curl the fake hair. it remains a mystery to me. anyway, i think that every girl i knew, without exception, had an oversized barbie head with a tray that closely resembled an emesis basin where the breasts should have been. the tray held all kinds of fun barrettes and ponytails and tiny brushes. i recall also that the barbie came complete with eyeshadow and blush sets and some very realistic lipstick. what the hell is that about? i was like 5 when i had this thing. but there i was, learning the tricks of "correction" for those facial abnormalities that nature provides us all. could it be possible that we were supposed to believe that even BARBIE HERSELF was not pretty without cosmetic assistance? how did any of us EVER develop feminist ideologies? freakin miracle. i recall too, the My Pretty Pony. i think that's what i am thinking of. there was a pretty pony and a little pony... one was a hard plastic brown horse too large for a barbie doll to sit on and it had a long blond tail and mane for braiding, brushing and general merriment. the other ponies were smaller horses that came in a wide variety of colors with stars and rainbows on their butts and they all smelled a little like fruit cocktail mixed with baby powder. i didn't really like those. they had no movable limbs and it was just not believable to bounce them around and pretend they were talking to each other. they sucked.

continuing with the theme, sara and i could not get enough Fashion Plates. who the hell thinks of this stuff? the procedure is a bit like copper tooling, but for children with much shorter attention spans. you just had to run a black crayon across a piece of paper that was locked into place with textured plates behind it, and VOILA! you had a pretty young lady with a fantastic outfit. we could mix and match shirts, skirts and pants. sometimes add a hat if i recall correctly. i remember absolutely loving this thing, but i have to wonder if it really was as boring as it seems to me when i imagine it now. sara was always more into it than i was, but she always told me i was a good designer. she also used to tell me that i was the best at making up barbie drama plots so i had to come over to her house sometimes even when she and another friend were playing barbies. just for story ideas. sara is a couple of years younger than i am AND sara played barbies FOREVER, so she had me doing this until i was at least 13 or 14. i made her promise to never tell, but i feel comfortable enough in my sexuality to admit it now.