not dead

december, as a rule, is a sucky month. it tends to end well, but everything leading up to those fantastic celebrations in the final week totally sucks the life right out of me. particularly the shopping part. if i spend too much time in shopping malls i start to see how sadly i am beginning to blend in to the masses. this is upsetting to me and i don't like to be faced with this reality for very long. i begin to worry that i will look into a mirror one day and see a midwestern woman with a spiral perm, pink lipstick and a festive seasonal sweater accented with a holly-adorned dickie. and brown loafers with thick socks that stretch midway up my calves. i already wear (on occasion) something that my mother would refer to as a "decent winter coat". i think it makes me look as though i have been recently tragically separated from my arctic cat. i am on thin ice and every move could lead to my final fall into all that i have worked so hard to resist. no more trips to the mall for this girl. it's homemade and internet gifts for everyone!
there is something to do nearly every evening in december. fun things, but eventually even those become a bit tiresome. i am ready for a quiet night alone with my lover, my doggies and my tivo. perhaps in january.
i am writing all of this nonsense simply to make an appearance and to say that i am not dead, just busy. i miss my regular visits to the computer and i thought i had best let my 3 readers know that i will be back. i know that my recent absence has not been too terribly alarming, nor has it disrupted the daily lives of anyone besides myself, but since one of my most recent posts had a photo of a woman with a gun to her head and i tend toward irritability and stress, i thought it best to drop by.
now i have to go to work. so i can buy things. so i can become normal. so i can buy things that normal people buy. i better get myself a third job. seasonal sweaters are expensive.